Stan Geiger

Paying Coaches

USA Today just came out with some data about pay for college football coaches. Every little bit of it is ridiculous.

Coach Saban of Alabama is the top-paid dude in the business. The paper says he is pulling down $5.9 million a year. Where is Alabama this year? Is the school playing for a national title? Is the school conference champs? Nope, on both counts.

Mack Brown, down there ta Texas, is second on the list. He's pulling down $5.1 million a year. This year, that comes to about a million bucks per win. With all his genius, and with some of the best talent available on his team, Mack couldn't find a way to win six lousy games and get bowl eligible.

Bob Stoops, down there ta Norman, is reportedly making $4.3 million dollars a year. Lord knows what he would be making if he had managed to win one of his past five BCS bowl appearances or one of his last three shots at a national title.

Mr. Gundy, down there ta Stillwater, is only making $1.9 million a year. One wonders how the man can survive. I mean how can he afford to keep himself in orange clothing, or pay his hairdresser, on a mere $160,000 a month? But then, I'm sure he doesn't have to worry about it. I'm sure the university pays for his extras, in spite of is enormous salary.

Todd Graham at TU is making a reported $804,253 a year. I doubt TU football nets enough money to even pay the head coach's salary.

Some schools, it seems, don't want people to know what football coaches are paid. Miami and Notre Dame---two programs that have sucked for years---were no-shows in the exam. Southern Cal---a school that is up to its butt in cheating problems---put up no number as well.

Basketball is no different. A couple of years ago, Jeff Capel of OU was handed a new contract. His base salary was upped to over a million bucks per year, and he was given a "stay bonus," that accrued at $100,000 per year for six years. Why was he given the new contract? Well, somebody determined that Capel is a basketball coaching genius that had to be kept at OU.

When last year ended, it was reported that OU had its worst season in 29 years. OU is stinking up the joint this year.

My, how Capel's multimillion-dollar coaching genius seemed to evaporate when Blake Griffin went pro.

But by all means, as the Republican Party argues, we shouldn't tax the proceeds of the aforementioned. That would be bad for the economy. Hell, taxing a bunch of coaching geniuses might even cost you your job.

Shaaaaw, as if!

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